Friday 21 August 2009

strange few days

These last few days I have felt like have been suspended in a bubble......I don't know if the bubble is protecting me......or just waiting for the right moment to drop me into the thick of things
However...I have gained a very clear idea of exactly what I would like in my future, and if I can't have what I would truly like then I would rather be alone. Being as I have been told more than once by fortune-tellers that I will live to be well over 80...that could be a very long lonely time.
But...I'd rather be properly happy or alone, than settle for second best....crumbs from another's table.
I know both my grandma's did it, but by being widowed...for 17 and 11 years each....I know that I might face longer than that....but I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't care.
And being as I am still in love with someone very dear to me...it ain't going to happen for ages.

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